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Being beautiful is not a duty: we don’t have to live with the obligation to change

Quando sentiamo che ciò facciamo per essere belli sta diventando un dovere, dovremmo fermarci perché non siamo obbligati a cambiarci

being beautiful, body positive, body positivity

Sometimes we like being beautiful. But not always. We like being beautiful when we feel it as an our creative expression and not a way to suppress the sense of unease for not looking good. We like being beautiful when we have fun doing it and not when it becomes a cause for anxiety and worry to hide the fear of something we don’t like about us.


There is always a sense of shame when we show ourselves. Women have always lived it, but we as men also feel we have to do it so that others take us seriously. Well-cut hair, beard not unkempt, suitable dress. Who will see me what will they think? And why do I need this validation?

Yet our body and how we choose to appear is about us and no one else. I mean, I’m the first to get a face mask or a nice suit to feel beautiful. But who actually has the time, energy and motivation to always do it, every single day? Seeing well can make us feel good about ourselves, but if one day we decide not to, why should we lose our value as human beings?

When being beautiful becomes a duty

For this reason, when we feel that everything we do to be beautiful is becoming a duty, we should stop. Because we don’t have to live with the obligation to change. How much time have we spent keeping up appearances just to please others? And when we do it we become small for fear of rejection. And also our voice, our ambitions, our talent, our desires, our uniqueness became little. We think we have to conform to have a voice in this world and to share ideas, but as we try to do it, the result is that we hold ourselves back.

In the end, how important is to be “normal” if this means not sharing ourselves? Let’s try not to contribute to the limited beliefs about what is normal. It’s normal to live life with vulnerability, courage, embracing failure, uncertainty, welcoming curiosity and experimenting. Let us not deny ourselves the freedom to simply be what we feel and not what we owe. Because the world needs us, not a prettier version of us.

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